ok. nursing this really bad cold. been sneezing e whole day. sneezing so hard tt my head hurts. hai. y muz this prob come back. hai. just had a ginger&garlic. feeling better. yay!
hist was just boring. don't rmb wad she said. arh heck la! then e bio prac was so damn difficult. dunno wad they asking sia. wad a bummer. then went kiren's place. suppose to play football. but his bro gave e ball away. so ended up playing bball. showed e whole world just how poor a player i am. hai. then scooted off 2gather wif hayden. saw andrea @ e coffeeshop, then eddie tan @ e bus-stop. a series of coincidences. wow...
i tink there's only 1 reason y my prob is back. but i can't decide which reason it is. could be
1) some1's cursing me... better not be true
or
2) some1 or some ppl is/are tinking of me. if its true, cannot help, hu ask me so charming :D bhb...
or
3) i'm really just sick... hai...
oh well.. tmr got hist again... sian. hate tt bitch. y muz haf her as teacher.. hai...
its over. if i ain't wrong. its over. all over. i don't stand a chance. hai...
i heard the crickets at 6:01 pm
--------------------
ole! its finally over. chi is over. yay! ole ole ole ole...
so finished wif e paper. went to e movies wif e brudders. ok, so madagascar (sp?) ain't exactly a guy movie, but wad e heck.... then jalan jalan. looked ard for new games. argh. e fan ban dian closed liao. police in singapore very efficient man.
damn. blew my chance. 1 chance. & i blew it. darn.
i heard the crickets at 5:24 pm
--------------------
i don't understand. i just don't. it was nv lyk tt. u used to be nice all round. nv really lost ur temper. but now, we don't noe how u really feel. i feel tt we can't really relax ard u. u seem to simmer quietly, happy 1 moment, then explode e next. u seem to treat us as ur punching bags, to vent ur frustrations on. now i tell u: we are not here for u to kick ard. fine, so you are not physical, but in every other way, u are as tyrannical & overbearing as ur father was. u only seek to force ur opinions on others. lyk when i 1st made up my mind to go to a poly, u didn't approve. only when mom talked u round did u agree. u nv ever accept e views of others. im so sick of arguing wif u over almost everything. i'm old enuf, & i believe its time u allow me to make my own decisions in certain areas. u may not noe it, but ur actions indirectly put pressure on me. i'm so tired. hate this...
i heard the crickets at 5:27 pm
--------------------
end of sch. e hols haf come. but wad sort of hols are these? this doesn't seem lyk e sch hols. it does not, not @ all. e dreaded report bk is back. expect to be grilled later. wonder wad freedoms i'll haf to gif up to keep my parents off my back. hai. hate it when my report bk doesn't exactly paint a rosy picture of my academic abilities...
liang yan's been telling e class to relax, & not tink too much this wkend. she's been telling ppl abt e grades they would get shud everything fall into place. hope she's rite. fingers crossed. nid some gd news frm sch. hope it comes in e best form possible: an A1!
feeling blue again. part of e reason is e results. e other... hai... i dunno. i just dunno. wad exactly do i want? wad do i wanna do next? all e feelings inside. its making me confused. i really dunno wad to do now. my life is gg nowhere...
i heard the crickets at 6:11 pm
--------------------
ok. massive fightback. bulldog spirit. damn gd final last nite. they actually came back frm 3 goals down. fantastic. classic final man. but damn wasted for milan. such talented guys, but such a way to lose a final...
so episode II of e great saga continued for PE. milan, aka jovin(shevchenko), kiren(seedorf), eric(kaka), alvin(dida), & me(pirlo), raced to a 3-0 lead. then pool, pulled 2 back. steven thought there would be a comeback. but we put 1 more in. william refused to gif up, helped his team score a 3rd. then damn tense. so many times they poured forward to try & grab e equaliser, but heng for alvin, jovin & a lot of luck. we were just hoping for e final whistle. then 1 quick counter-attack, & we put in e final nail. phew! heng man. a few times i thought tt we had given them e equaliser. but, no! we held on. yay!
really sleepy during chi. can only rmb liang yan droning. hopefully it doesn't cost me on mon...
i heard the crickets at 6:47 pm
--------------------
Happy bd Leonard! for ur sake i hope liverpool wins, but deep inside, i hope milan pull it off. they're got an all-round better team. :X don't say anymore. sekali later u come & hang me...
got back e last of e results. ok. so my results are quite crap. hai. gotta do sth soon. e hols. gotta use them well...
tmr got football! yay! liverpool vs milan episode II: steven vs jovin! can't wait. this yr's final has got e biggest build-up since '99. oh glorious '99! was tinking of following e game. but, tmr got sch. sian. so big a game, & i haf to miss it. hai. damn hyper now. football just gives me an adrenline rush. woah! shiok man!
shevchenko! shevchenko! shevchenko!...
i heard the crickets at 6:23 pm
--------------------
ok. so chi lessons were cancelled for e aft. shucks. only 6 days left. got back all e sciences. didn't do as well as i'd hoped. got a totally crap result for chem, just passed physics, & bio was just average. e maths wasn't tt great either. so as u can imagine, we got grilled. e whole class. we aren't @ e standard, they say...
so sick of all tt. tired la. everyday its e same thing. it just nv changes. so can tell wad they are gonna say next. but tt doesnt make me numb to it. it just makes me...
so yearn for e old times. when ppl weren't so far apart. when all this nonsense wasn't ard. when all e feelings aren't ard. i so yearn for those times. when i felt alot closer to e class. e ppl in e class. now, we're almost lyk strangers. i'm just so worn out. can i ever feel e same as be4? lyk i truly belong?
i heard the crickets at 5:02 pm
--------------------
i shudn't be here. shudn't @ all. there's alot to do. but e old problems are back. procastination. been fighting it e whole day, wif limited success. done only a fraction of wad i wanted to, hai. my bro's destroying my rating on pool. getting thrashed wif my acc. double hai. been reading up on courses @ tp. really interesting. can just picture all e exciting changes e poly will offer me. no more mugging, more room to do my own thing. to live my life e way i want to. all sort of combinations i can take. really cool... so e problem all of us dismissed as a petty quarrel ain't so simple issit? u ppl ain't toking no more. but 4 yrs. u gals were 2gather 4yrs. hasn't enuf time passed to heal e wounds. u gals aren't just frenz... u are buddies... having been thru so much, issit worth throwing it all away now?wake up each morning. tinking. missing. i noe it can nv be possible. 4getting...
i heard the crickets at 6:07 pm
lost. we lost e final. it's just heart-breaking. to dominate & still lose, on pen. too. it's just shattering. i can't believe it. all Utd fans can't believe it too... it's just too much to take in. it's gd there's e summer break. helps to get over e agony of coming so close only to lose. i'll be nursing this hurt for 3 mths, be4 e new season kicks off. 3 mths... hai... gotta take e ribbing in sch on tues, & for e next 3 mths as well... hai...
leonard! bd coming huh? for ur sake, i hope pool wins e final. but u guys noe hu i'll be supporting come wed nite... milan!!!
i heard the crickets at 1:06 pm
--------------------
having a terrible stomachache now. been on for a while. hell. all this just be4 e final, damn. trying to survive long enuf to follow e final on e web, since, as all my football kakis will noe by now, i don't haf cable. kinda quiet now, since quite a few leagues haf reached their conclusion. tink tt e only big game in europe 2nite is e final. e build-up this yr has been muted. muz be all e rubbish off e field. just distracts every1 frm wad really matters. winning e cup may just be a consolation, but i tink it is a must to win. lose, & it would be e end of e golden era for Utd. pessimistic for a fan, huh? but tts how i see it, since glazer owns e club now...
intended to follow e final wif jen somewhere tt has a big screen. but couldn't find a place. so e 2 of us diehards gotta find another way. hai. would've been cool to follow e images live, & not just haf words.
no badminton 2day. sori guys. i 4got to book e court e other day. my fault. would haf loved to play, suppose e guys feel e same way too. damn wasted. sori guys...
hai. just thought of all e 'O's... & e CTs... results ain't too gd. could've been a lot better. & e chi paper's coming. still got a procastinating attitude. ain't helping e least. trying to fight it...
chiong ah!
i heard the crickets at 9:38 pm
woke up feeling tired. wow. my words are beginning to sound funny. hai. just wanna haf a break. 4get abt everything, & just enjoy life. busy. hectic. hate those words. prefer, serenity, quiet... blah... toking rubbish again...
FA Cup final! ole! Utd gotta win this. for e fans, for fergie. could be his last match in charge. for e fans, after all e glazer rubbish. for e players sake as well; glazer wouldn't spare them for losing. gotta beat arsenal. finish our season on a high, end their's on a sour note. wanna see keane lift tt title again. so wanna see tt happen... it muz happen...
pahang. sec 3 camp. it lyk happened just yesterday, & now its back again. still rmb kang sheng, faqeh & all, e jokes, e bonding. aside frm e np guys, it doesn't get any better... e sec 3s will definitely enjoy this, lyk we all did.
annual camp coming. can see e sec 3s preparing, lyk we did last yr. can see them rush abt, struggle to get things done, lyk us. can almost see them doing all e push-ups, lyk we did. e camp really bonded us. & it will be same for them, & e sec 1s & 2s. can't wait for campfire nite. will be a sort of a reunion. a gathering of "heroes". can't wait...
i heard the crickets at 6:30 pm
--------------------
wah... damn tired man... e chi is wearing me down. just so tired. dozed off a few times 2day. i'm sure i was caught by liang yan, just tt she didn't say a thing. watched "To Kill A Mockingbird". e movie was ok. deep undertones in e story. maybe abit too deep, since i was so tired...so preston face west ham next wk. wonder hu'll make it. hope its e hammers... they would, in my opinion add more quality to e premiership, but then again, u nv noe...wad i feel now...i don't noe how to put them down in words. found them thru a song...Coz obviously she's out of my league,
I'm wasting my time coz she'll never be mine
And I know I never will be good enough for her
No no
Never will be good enough for her
mcfly -- obviously
frenz... jus frenz...
i heard the crickets at 6:27 pm
--------------------
Survival Sunday. wad memories. fantastic wkend of games. so west brom haf done e impossible. e great escape. last @ christmas, las be4 e last round of games, they r in e premiership for next season. mind-blowing. all down to robson. former utd man wad. of coz he can do it. i'm surprised norwich collapsed though. pole position. but they r now down in e championship. sad. such battlers. but its even worse for e saints. 27 yrs, & now they're out. sad sia. sad. so, now, e last big games for e english season would be e cup final & e play-offs. hope utd clean house on sat, & ipswich make their return to e premiership...
wad a long day. e 1 day i 4get to get my bio bk for class, lela's not ard. heng sia... eng gave tt stupid test. dunno how to do, so wrote rubbish. tmr last paper. ole! but then chi 'o's coming. damn. hate tt weight of expectation. its bearing down on me, & i bet its only gonna get heavier...
i heard the crickets at 3:27 pm
--------------------
jus found out tt 1 of my entry's received e response, but frm e wrong person. i don't mean anything. but e ans frm e wrong person mucks up e situation. i don't really noe wads gg on now... it looks a mess to me. so wad shld i do next. i don't noe. tt confusion is back. too many qn, too few ans. so... i tink... its best i clear e air. perhaps it would be better.
ok. tt day. i was feeling blue. i had just done sth i really dreaded. so tt was e 1st para. e 2nd para. was addressed to her. i just wanna put my feelings aside. i just wanna be frenz wif ya. i hope tt we still can be frenz. hope tt our friendship still exists. i don't wanna lose a gd friend lyk u. it would hurt a hell lot more than anything in e world. r we still frenz?
i heard the crickets at 6:18 pm
--------------------
rite. got a new blogskin. finally. finally sorted out all e problems wif e stupid thing. rite. hope u guys lyk it.
e final game of e season's tmr. a long season has finally come down to this. nth left to play for @ e top. still can't believe e team gave chelsea e GOH treatment. wad a disgrace, admitting defeat to scum lyk tt. it hurts to see them do tt. proud red devils such as keane & neville muz haf preferred to die then do tt, but, they had to do it anyway. damn. it hurts me damn bad. e pride of e team & e fans has been hurt damn bad...
been tinking abt e whole poly-jc thing. somehow i tink, e powers-tt-be are hinting to me. e moment i decided to go to a poly, e moe decided to bring back e pae, gifs me a chance @ trying out @ a jc. then e direct thingy. might be a sign, jus might be... but then it could be a case of e forbidden fruit. tempting, but it could be my doom.
e days are winding down. can almost feel e 'O's now. chi is e 1st hurdle. muz do well, muz...
been tinking. abt her. trying to let go. but somehow, it seems, there's a part of me tt doesn't want to. i don't understand. its clear i stand no chance. i tink she has some1 else in mind, wadsmore there's e 'o's... even if these factors didn't exist, i tink i wouldn't stand a chance. hai...
let go... let go...
i heard the crickets at 6:36 pm
--------------------
e gloom is back... hai... been a long day. english was exceptionally long. raja just tok & tok. just blah, blah & more blah. was so uninterested. temasek poly here i come... heck e stupid jc...
then e extinguisher incident. it was totally stupid. verma is such a bitch. kao bei kao bu. damn her. no need to embarass ppl in front of whole class rite? just picking on wj... tt stupid bitch. can't stand her. was so tempted to throw e hist. bk @ her, then realised e bk was rui qi's... couldn't do tt. ok, fine, so he did a silly thing, & william didn't deserve to kena e dry powder, but hell, did she haf to do tt? so hate tt bitch. hate hist. lessons.. arggh...
all e brudders wanna kill her now. she'd better watch her back. she is so in trouble...
aft sch, went to play football wif leonard, sam & jen ard my place. kicked e ball ard, just to relieve stress. then had lunch wif them. now rotting here. hai.
glazer's now taken over. no 1 can feel e pain tt's in my heart, to see e club i so love, selling its very soul, to of all ppl, tt devil. y? y? so great a team, gonna be decimated by tt vile creature. i'm just shattered. it kills me to even tink tt e vile monster will run e club now. it's a totally horrible feeling...
tried so hard to fight e hurt, only to haf it back. my life is topsy-turvy all over again. & all my old wounds haven't healed yet. e pain is just killing me...
i heard the crickets at 5:59 pm
--------------------
football in e rain. totally rocked. was a lot more fun than usual. e slippery field made things interesting. just tt joe went in 2 footed. halo? trying to kill ppl arh? relax la...
e last few days have been just 1 paper after another. really, really tired. its gd there's a break be4 e next 1... otherwise sure die...
was feeling in e pits recently. if not for e brudders, i tink i wouldn't haf made it. e whole trouble is, no matter how gd they r @ cheering me up in sch, they can't help me @ nite, when i just lie there, tinking. all my feelings just come back, haunting me. it just kills me. its hell every nite. it hurts so bad. when will it end? i noe e feelings gotta stop, don't wanna lose a friend...
i heard the crickets at 6:27 pm
--------------------
it sux. totally sux. tt is how i feel rite now. a lot going thru now. i'm just confused, guilty. perhaps i shld haf done it long ago. i don't noe. wad i noe it does not feel gd. its just totally horrible. i would so hate to haf to do it again. i'd rather die...
my life is going nowhere. in fact, i tink its got worse. i don't noe how i'm gonna survive in sch. wif tests & all. it's really a drag. hell. hate it. it ain't just e tests, everything. my life is a mess, every single part of it. i just wanna be frenz. will she ever accept me, as a friend. i just wanna put my feelings behind. i rather be frenz. don't wanna lose a gd friend. it would hurt a hell lot more than anything. r we still frenz?
i heard the crickets at 5:48 pm
--------------------
hell. wad a long wk.sch has been largely irritating as usual. i've lost interest in sch. all e tests, stress & e rest of e rubbish. it's all taking its toll. just so tired. damn. wake up every morning & just don't feel lyk getting out of bed. e only thing gd abt sch now r e guys. always cheer me up, damn happy when they r ard. samuel, jen, wc, leonard etc. u guys r really great man.football for PE yesterday. played deep since so few guys playing. enjoyed breaking up attacks. so loved those crunching tackles. tingles e spine just tinking abt them. felt lyk gattuso. damn song!2day e bladdy chi p2 so damn difficult. almost died. sure kena frm liang yan when she return e paper. hai. verma was a pain. blah. BLAH. 2 periods gone just lyk tt. so waste time sia. raja oso just tok alot of rubbish. damn horrible day.hai. season finishing soon. then 3 months no euro football. HAI. got loads of tests this wk. spoils my mood really, not tt its really gd now la. hai. eh... sighing a lot 2day... so tired of sch sia. need a long, gd holiday...r we still frenz?
i heard the crickets at 6:43 pm
--------------------
ok. it feels weird, a holiday. mon has not felt lyk tt for a long time. but it feels helluva gd. xiao gu & her family came 2day. showed us photos of her trip to China. how terribly exciting. so tok... tok... & tok somemore. totally disrupted studying. not in e mood anymore. tts y i'm here.
lots to study for chi. hate studying. makes life.. meaningless. life ain't supposed to be spent behind bks tt one has no use for in later life. y can't we all be schooled lyk in switzerland, they do it e sch of hard knocks style. NO.... we do it e boring & irrelevant way...
2day's papers featured a 4 pg special on chelsea. ptui. wad a waste of valuable paper. to feature tt bunch of morons, e straits times wastes prefectly innocent, harmless paper. they shld use it for more impt things... lyk covering jus how great a guy i am :D j'king j'king...
tinking of trying out a couple of sports after 'O's... ok... a bit too soom to tink of tt huh? concentrate... concentrate...
i heard the crickets at 6:45 pm
--------------------
ok. crazy sat nite. when football season winds down, it gets really interesting. sadly, forest got relegated again. euro champs 25 yrs ago, they're gonna play league 1 next season. sad man. saints gave themselves a fighting chance, could actually survive! & damn, chelsea haf been confirmed as champs. just detest tt mourinho. stupid arse...
woke up wif a bit of a swollen nasal passage. don't feel all tt gd. perhaps i'm falling sick... hai. haven't really started on ss. i noe tts gonna put me in trouble, but as usual, i've a problem getting down to work. chi p2 looms. oso haven't started on tt 1. sure die! gotta start 2day...
still tinking of her. minus e hurt. look on e bright side they always say, so ok...
been reading ppl's blogs. just realised i might haf been too self-absorbed abt my own problems tt i've perhaps not thought abt others. perhaps i've not been listening as much as i shld haf. & i apologise to u guys. so to u fellas, i'm always ard for u guys. share ur problems. i promise to listen, & listen gd...
i heard the crickets at 11:49 am
--------------------
