Tuesday, January 30, 2007

18. =)

Thanks guys! To Leonard, Meiling, Jen, Jaime, Sheng Yang, Chee Seng, William, Jun Hao, June, Wan Ting, Joyce, Jun Kiat, Andrea, Joel, Chiaw Khim, Chuan Liang, Cherylene, Michelle, Jodeline, Pei Yun, Jun Jun, Zhi Hao, Shawn, Chee Leng, Ahmad, Darren, Yanda, Meimei, Xiangyun, Joan, Anqi, Ambrose, Victor, Si Jing, Sarah, Cheryl, John, Fiora, Hui Joo, Shi Han, Daphne, Hui Chan, Asri, Kiren, and all the others I might have accidently left out, I owe a BIG thank you! You guys really made my day. =)

i heard the crickets at 11:51 pm

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Sunday, January 28, 2007

It hurts. It hurts to see you in anguish. But as much as I want to do something for you, I can't. I don't know what to do. I don't even know whether you'll let me do anything for you. I just want to be the one to catch your tears, to make you smile. Man, what I would give for that.

I just want you to be happy. Everything else doesn't matter.

i heard the crickets at 12:38 pm

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Saturday, January 27, 2007

OLE! Singapore's done it! We've beaten the Malaysians! How sweet this revenge. Was in the stands the last time the last time the two sides met in a competitive fixture. THAT very match. It was hard to swallow, and it still hurts la. Even after so long. So to win in the cruellest manner possible (penalties) was just fantastic. Didn't get to be there in the flesh this time, but it still feels so damn great.

Things looked bleak when the Malaysians went ahead early in the second half. It was agony for us fellas around the telly; another painful defeat staring at us. But Ridhuan's goal put back on level terms, and set up a tense half-hour of extra time. With both sides failing to capitalise on their chances, they put us all through the agony of a shoot-out. Man, the most hellish five minute periods in my football life. When Lionel Lewis made the save that ended it all, we went bananas. Just pure relief, pure ecstasy. Revenge tastes so so so sweet. Man, I should've been there. LOL.

You're the vision of an angel. What can I say?

i heard the crickets at 11:20 pm

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Friday, January 26, 2007

First formal duty. What can I say? Its tough. Mentally taxing. Pretty much the same as NPCC, just a lot less sweat, and I get to come off looking pretty good. =P

There are some things that you can't put out of your head. And then there are some things that you CAN'T put out of your head. =\

i heard the crickets at 9:43 pm

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Wednesday, January 24, 2007

If I could do it all over again, I would've been a lot more daring, a lot more expressive. Probably shouldn't have held back. But then, time will never turn back. So I guess I'll never ever know.

You're beautiful.

i heard the crickets at 7:12 pm

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Monday, January 22, 2007

Promised myself not to let the world get to me again. Broke that promise much too soon.

Remember the question you asked me bro? Its not right. I'm not right. This isn't right.

i heard the crickets at 7:14 pm

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Sunday, January 21, 2007

Its gonna be 10 years this week, aye, 10 years since Granddad's passing. He's missed; still spoken about in revered tones. My memories are sketchy, and most of what I know is taken from the stories my relatives tell me. But even then, at 8, I knew he was a giant among men.

He loved children, and would spend his Sundays playing with us. Bouncing the little ones on his knee, or tickling us till we teared. He was selfless, and put off starting his own family to help look after his brother's brood, which numbered 20 in all. Eventually, he had 6 of his own, and despite earning a pittance from his work at the shipyards, he managed to put them through some form of education. He was a pious man, and often helped out at the temple, especially during big events. Even when he was close to the end, he stood fast to his beliefs and his faith, and never gave up believing. He was active elsewhere in the community, helping the neighbours, or at various organisations like the union. He had a band of close friends with whom he would go gallivanting around Singapore. To places such as the airport, or to take in some new place somewhere. It might not seem like much to many people, but he did that without being able to read, and being able to converse only in Hokkien. He must have had a way with people, charisma, or perhaps it was simply down to his caring heart, for at his wake, there were many people who came by, each one bemoaning his passing, each one having a story to tell about how he made a difference in their lives. For a man who led as simple a life as he did, the number of people who turned up over those 3 days was overwhelming. Aye, he was a good man, a great man.

When people talk of men they admire and aspire to be like, they usually mean men of great fame or fortune, sometimes both. But my choice is a simple man, a humble man, but without a doubt, a man of strength, of honesty, of integrity.

Tickles just haven't been the same.

i heard the crickets at 9:57 am

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Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Alright! Singapore's through to the semis! Yay! Missed the first half and five minutes of the second, but what a finish the game produced. It was nail-biting to the very end. Came back just in time to see Indra put Singapore into the lead with a poacher's header. The euphoria didn't last very long though, with the Indonesians storming back within 5 minutes. A well-worked corner and a superb chest-and-volley restored parity.

So, for some of the longest 30 minutes of my life, Singapore put everything on the line to prevent the Indonesians from scoring. A draw would've been enough, especially with the 11-0 rout of the Laotians on Monday. And so it was, brutal and scrappy, right up to the very end. But the wait was worth it, and we've been rewarded with a semi-final clash against the Old Enemy. Next Wednesday's the visit to Malaysia, with the 27th the return leg. Man, so wanna beat them. Come on Lions!

Falling sick. Bleagh.

i heard the crickets at 11:47 pm

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Monday, January 15, 2007

Happy birthday Meiling! First one to 18! Its gonna be 6 years of fantastic friendship, and even after all that time, things haven't changed by much, have they? 2304 rocks!

"One Last Dance". Unconventional, and very interesting. Francis Ng was superb really; carried the show right to the end. Most of the other actors weren't all that good, save the police captain. But its worth the ticket price. So yea. Watch.

Dinner at Swensen's. It was pretty good. Saw Derick there with his friends. Yea. Small world. Very small really. Met loads of people around City Hall in just one day: Denan, Joel, Ren Liang etc. Man, its been a long time. Anyway, dinner was great. Plenty to laugh about.

Ran out of cash and didn't know till the cab reached the foot of my block. LOL.

Hope you liked your surprise!

i heard the crickets at 12:08 am

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Saturday, January 13, 2007

Alright then. Loads of football coming up, almost as if Santa decided to give us all another dose of the festive programme. Our very own Lions begin the defence of their AFF Cup crown today, up against Vietnam. Our chances look pretty slim this year. The strikers are either not in the best of form, or they're just on their way back from injuries. We look a little weak defensively; a cause for concern surely, especially with the forwards that teams like Indonesia have. But we're on home soil for the first round, and playing in the National Stadium. So that could work out, crucially, in our favour. Hoping for the best now.

Come on Lions!

i heard the crickets at 1:39 pm

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Thursday, January 11, 2007

Computer's dying on me. First the mouse. Then the clock. And now sound. All my music files rotting away. Dang. What a bloody waste. Probably have to get it changed before the year is out. Crap.

Had a terrible night yesterday. Couldn't sleep. Man, too many things in my head. What am I doing with my life? Is this all right? I just don't know. Am I carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders? I might have to say yes. I simply think too much, too far. I'm might just be doing too many things. I'm just so tired man. And not even sleep can give me my rest. I just want to be at peace man. Surely that ain't too much to ask?

i heard the crickets at 11:27 pm

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Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Took me a while to figure this out, and I'm glad I finally did. Many thanks to Sheng Yang for giving me the idea for where to start.

Song lyrics speak volumes.

i heard the crickets at 9:33 pm

"Blood Diamond". Awesome movie. Thought-provoking. Didn't hit me as hard emotionally and mentally as "Flags Of Our Fathers" did. But it still hit me pretty hard. Just what price would a man pay for the people he loves?

"Its the action; no man is good or bad. Its what he does.", so said the old schoolmaster. Perhaps he's right.

i heard the crickets at 7:42 pm

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Sunday, January 07, 2007

Teddy Geiger - Try Too Hard

Love, life

One speaks for the other one here

And love, life

One speaks for the other one now

We'll try to get by

Did anyone try too hard?

Well I guess I did.

I guess I did. alright.

She'll break my heart.

Did anyone try too hard?

Well I guess I did.

I guess I did, alright.

And she'll break my heart.

She'll break my heart.

'Cause ever since the minute I saw your face.

I knew I wanted to be in that place, next to you.

And now I'll spend my whole life tryin'.

To be the one inside your arms.

And I'll try to get by.

Did anyone try too hard?

Well I guess I did.

I guess I did. alright.

She'll break my heart.

Did anyone try too hard?

Well I guess I did.

I guess I did, alright.

And she'll break my heart.

She'll break my heart.

Break my little heart.

Isn't it alright?

Why can't it be just this once alright?

It will be you and me.

Did anyone try too hard?

Well I guess I did.

I guess I did. alright.

She'll break my heart.

Did anyone try too hard?

Well I guess I did.

I guess I did, alright.

And she'll break my heart.

She'll break my heart.

Lyrics courtesy of LyricsMansion

i heard the crickets at 11:43 pm

Man, not feeling too good now. I think I'm coming down with something. Damn terok now la. And there's still work to complete. Perhaps I shouldn't have lazed around as much as I did over the last week. Yea.

Just wanna finish it all now so I can sleep.

i heard the crickets at 2:31 pm

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Saturday, January 06, 2007

Alright. Just got back from the Sports Symposium. I'm beat. Its been an awfully long day. First official day back, projects, poker, CCA. Yea. I'm flat out tired.

The event was badly organised lah. And it was pretty boring, with plenty of what was said going in one way and coming out the other. What it did manage to do was bring out the guilt, the sort of guilt you get when you indulge, and forget all about working out and playing sports. The guilt you get when you think you're not doing what you can, that you're not trying hard enough. Yea. That sorta guilt.

Ohwell, the guilt will go away.

Got my pay for S2006, and in collecting my money, I managed to catch up with a couple of people. Cheryl told me that she missed, and still does miss, S2006 a great deal. Man, I didn't know whether to agree, didn't know what to say. So to borrow a line from the penguins in "Madagascar": "Just smile, and wave."

And so thats what I did.

i heard the crickets at 12:50 am

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Thursday, January 04, 2007

Oasis - Wonderwall

Today is gonna be the day

That they're gonna throw it back to you

By now you should've somehow

Realized what you gotta do

I don't believe that anybody

Feels the way I do about you now

Backbeat the word was on the street

That the fire in your heart is out

I'm sure you've heard it all before

But you never really had a doubt

I don't believe that anybody feels

The way I do about you now

And all the roads we have to walk along are winding

And all the lights that lead us there are blinding

There are many things that I would

Like to say to you

I don't know how

Because maybe

You're gonna be the one who saves me ?

And after all

You're my wonderwall

Today was gonna be the day?

But they'll never throw it back to you

By now you should've somehow

Realized what you're not to do

I don't believe that anybody

Feels the way I do

About you now

And all the roads that lead to you were winding

And all the lights that light the way are blinding

There are many things that I would like to say to you

I don't know how

I said maybe

You're gonna be the one who saves me ?

And after all

You're my wonderwall

I said maybe

You're gonna be the one who saves me ?

And after all

You're my wonderwall

Said maybe

You're gonna be the one that saves me

You're gonna be the one that saves me

You're gonna be the one that saves me

Lyrics courtesy of LyricMansion.

i heard the crickets at 12:14 pm

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Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Hurt my back yesterday helping my dad. Felt it twitch, but nothing else, so I didn't think too much about it. It made me think hard about it this morning. Bugger. Hurts when I bend over, and there's golf tomorrow. Fantastic.

Condenser's been removed, so that leaves the two broken down air-conditioners. Ohwell, it doesn't matter anymore. So, good riddance.

Its been a topsy-turvy day.

I've been naive. Naive for a long time. In fact, its been three and a half years. I was naive to think that Uncle Lui's passing would bring the family closer, and end old feuds; to unite the family against those who seek to sow discord. But the events in that time have proven me wrong. Its tough to take. So damn tough. I'm weary of it all. Weary of all the melodrama, weary of the politiking, weary of the backstabbing. I'm sick of watching them tear each other apart. I've seen what a toll its taken on my parents. How they have aged, especially my dad. I'm tired of it all.

Where's my idyllic beach when I need it?

i heard the crickets at 6:49 pm

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Tuesday, January 02, 2007

And so it is, the 2nd of January, in the year 2007. Man, its a special day isn't it? School normally starts on this day, but thanks to a quirk on the calendar, we all get an extra day off. Speaking of opening days, its been 11 years to the day since I met my first best friend. Apprehensive little critters we were then, paired up by the form teacher (whose name I have, sadly, forgotten). She struggled that day, as she always does on opening day, with bawling six year olds, or with little children who would take a wrong turn and end up in the wrong classroom. She tried to make it girls on one side, and boys on the other, but gave up when she remembered she was dealing with little kids who still went "EEEEEEEEEEUW!" when presented with the notion of holding hands with a member of the opposite sex.

So it was then, that a chubby fellow stood next to me, and as our form teacher marched us off to the classroom, the uneasiness sank in. Away from the concourse we went, away from our parents, and into the bowels of classroom hell. Tears down the cheeks of a few of the kids, including my chubby friend. Tried to comfort him I did, but it didn't work. The nice form teacher had to step in, and make the Sun shine again for my friend.

Although I didn't manage to make him feel better that day, he and I quickly became the best of friends. Inseparable really. The two of us, and a little band of little tyros; Si Rong, Dhayalan, Haziq, just to name a few. We played, we laughed, we fought, we competed, but we were best friends, and that was all that mattered.

Then we began to grow up. As time passed our differences began to pull us apart. He went his way, I went mine. A dispute made it worse, and enemies the two of us became. Saddness filled my heart, for I had lost my best friend, but pride stopped me from saying sorry, and patching things up. And so it continued, for over a year or two, a cold war, an iron curtain.

Till the day we collected our PSLE results, we didn't speak much. Then, on that day, his Mom and my Mom met, and began to chat. His Mom, magnanimous as she is (bless her), first extended the olive branch, and all was well again. We shook hands, our enmity extinguished, friends again we were.

We went to different schools, and I saw him only sporadically after that. On the bus too, for his school was down the road from mine. But bus meetings are terrible for catching up, and so we never got to talk much. So little time, but whenever I looked back, I remembered fondly our friendship, and hoped in my heart of hearts that he was doing well, that his family was doing well.

Then the posting results came out. And to TP I went. Lo, and behold! Guess who I saw at Orientation? My best friend of course! We exchanged contacts, talked abit about family and what had been happening in our lives. We began to talk again, more frequently now, and sometimes, almost as if we were back in primary school, when all was right.

My, my, haven't we come a long way now my friend? Thank you for being my buddy, for cheering me up when I was sad, for giving me help when I needed it. To 11 years (12 by your reckoning) of friendship! Cheers, Chiaw Khim, cheers!

i heard the crickets at 6:07 pm

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Monday, January 01, 2007

Alright. Wasted last night. Didn't go out. Dang. Regret now man. What a waste. =\

Back from my distant cousin's wedding. She's the daughter of my Mom's cousin. So ya. Anyway, the groom looks really familiar. Seen him sometime, somewhere before, just can't remember when and where exactly. Dang. Anyway, got to catch up with my cousins, which as always, is a great thing. Shun Geng's doing well, I guess, as always. His sister, Qiu Rong, isn't doing too bad herself. Finished top of her level in school, and she's entering the triple science class in her school. All down to her hard work. So congrats to her. Grace did pretty well too I guess; got some Edusave award. Jason's really tall now, taller than me (Damnit!). His brother Andy didn't go though. Our Indian Chief. Lol. Haven't seen him in a while. Yea. Ah Zhai's entering the army soon. Yea. Nothing much else I heard. But I must apologise. This probably doesn't make any sense to you guys. LOL.

i heard the crickets at 8:53 pm

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